Internet Radio Show
The Truth about Karma in Relationships
- Dr. Carmen Harra
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In today’s episode of Healing from Within, your host, Sheryl Glick, author of her newest book The Living Spirit: Answers for Healing and Infinite Love which highlights Sheryl’s personal search to discover decode and connect fully to Universal Energy, healing and spiritual communication in order to offer spiritual tools and methods that can move people to successfully become Conscious Aware Higher Souls who can manifest their most joyful and successful life experience, welcomes Dr. Carmen Harra who is a former guest of the show and author of 7 books. Today we will discuss her new book co-authored with her daughter Alexandra Harra, The Karma Queens’ Guide to Relationships.
Carmen Harra, who is an internationally acclaimed intuitive psychologist author spiritual teacher and karmic counselor shares her gift of otherworldly sight which became apparent from a young age when she had a near death experience from drowning and will show us the secret of how to transform the karma in all our relationships including attracting or keeping your soul mate. Carmen has an interesting early life She was born in Transylvania Romania and began touring Europe as a singing sensation releasing 12 albums and moved to America where as part of her personal transformation reinvented her career and received a PhD in Clinical Psychology. She has been fortunate to meet and coach Hillary and Bill Clinton, Vice President Biden, Shirley MacLaine, Barbara Walters, Joy Behar, Nancy Pelosi, Candice Bergen, Whoopi Goldberg, Ben Affleck, Deepak Chopra, and many others. Carmen has employed her spiritual gifts to advance a greater view of Spirit, life and the afterlife and offers insights from a deep sense of knowingness and experience to show how we are affected by our past connections to each other and Universal life forces. Alexandra her daughter is, as her mother, a gifted talented author and is a certified life coach who writes professionally for the Huffington Post and is a sought after model.
We begin the show with Carmen sharing an intimate and provocative remembrance from childhood that may have been the influence that guided her to the work and passionate life she lives now… At about 5 years old Carmen drowned in a river near her home. Her father rescued her but she already had gotten a glimpse of the world beyond our own. While unconscious, Carmen recalls being transported through a white light and emerging into a picturesque setting of green valleys and silent streams. Several beings in white robes approached her and told her to go back. It wasn’t her time they said. Carmen returned to the normal world, but not without an added talent a heightened sensitivity and the gift of clairvoyance. Growing up, Carmen had incredible accurate visions…larger than life visions. That’s what predictions are…visions that are part destiny and part free will. When Carmen makes a prediction for someone she expands their self-vision…and then they might take that hope and manifest it into reality.
Carmen and Alexandra tell us that “The secret is that karma is both the problem and the solution. Karma is the accumulation of our thoughts, intentions and actions both good and bad. The energy of Karma manifests in everyday life. It gets attached to our consciousness until it is dealt with. We carry our karma like luggage on a trip so our experiences in this lifetime draw their origins in past lives. Karma is not quite as simple as what goes around comes around…or how you treat others is how they will treat you. The Sanskrit word Karma means the force of thoughts and deeds. This energy manifests as beliefs, emotions and actions. The energy of Karma becomes woven into your personal energy field or consciousness. It gets attached to the soul and remains there lifetime after lifetime until it is resolved. Action creates memory and karma is “the memory of the soul.”
The three truths of karma:
- Karma is the sum of every thought intention and action,--Whatever actions you take have lasting effects because everything in the Universe is energy and energy can never be destroyed only transformed. Everything including our thoughts and actions are connected to this field of energy.
- Karma is always reversible and can be healed. Changing your karma is easier than trying to change other people. First you must become aware by allowing yourself to feel either embarrassed ashamed or defensive and move past blaming others. Actually feel that twinge of guilt when you vent about someone who has upset you…Remember what you may have done to contribute to the event and try to control how you feel, act, and think.
- Healing Karma requires Action…. Resolving karma requires work….. We can clear old karmic blockages from our predestined path and master our Karma…. Most of us don’t act in the right time and cause ourselves more suffering because of that..There is a divine time for things to happen and sometimes we force things to happen when they are not meant to. While it is painful to cut off patterns of relationships remember it will make it possible to bring in new types of people with whom you can foster healthier relationships…YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD TO YOURSELF EVEN AS YOU ARE BEING HONEST ABOUT YOURSELF AND ABOUT YOUR WEAKNESSES..You can balance the karmic books and return to a clean slate and being comfortable within yourself and with the world.
Sheryl says “Many people think karma is about cause and effect or action and then a reaction, but, actually it is a cycle of completion, growth, or support that is present in all our relationships…Life seems to be about relationships and how they offer us the way to refine our inner soul essence so we may develop a greater awareness of important Universal values such as compassion love abundance developing spiritual talents and gifts and appreciate the world of the physical and spiritual dimensions.”
Karma reveals influences or unfinished explorations of Self from past life times and has a great effect on our handling of relationships in this life. Karma offers us a way to reverse negative patterns and make new choices in dealing with our challenges so we can awaken to unlimited love and happiness. Carmen writes…”Long before we are born we begin to create relationships and consequently karmic ties. You are karmically linked to your mother who gave birth to you and to your father because you are his product. To a lesser degree you are karmically linked to the doctor who delivered you, the kindergarten teacher who scolded you, your first boyfriend or girlfriend who broke your heart ( or whose heart you broke) and so on. You go through life creating karma, resolving it, creating it, resolving it until your body is ready to expire and your soul ascends to the higher realm. The hope is that by then, all of your karma will have been healed rectified and you will be restored to the peace loving soul you truly are.
When you get distracted your mind can go on autopilot and you are not paying attention…The same thing happens in your relationships. You find yourself not speaking up when you are feeling disrespected or you start arguing about inconsequential matters to avoid what’s really bothering you. The karma you create by not being honest with yourself and your partner and not working through the real problems accumulates and you will continue to meet the same uncomfortable feelings and have poor results until change is made.
Sheryl reminds Carmen that we both admire the ancient poet and philosopher Rumi and he suggests to create or correct any karma…. 1. Challenge fear 2. Be Bold 3. Have Gratitude 4. Take Action 5. Have Faith ( As you start to walk out on the way, the way appears) 6. Embrace Setbacks 7. Look Inside (Your task is not to seek for love but find the barriers you have created within yourself against it.) 8. Learn from Suffering ( The wound is the place where the light enters you.) 9. Don’t be concerned with what others think about you 10. Do what you love. In following these basic precepts you can create beautiful new karma and life patterns.
Everyone we meet plays an integral role in our karma patterns and the karma we share with one person impacts our dynamic with another. It accounts for the relationships we cultivate overall: if our karma is clogged we attract the same types of complicated people. When we become trapped in a cycle of bringing in partners with the same tendencies our relationships will fail time and time again. Understanding the different types of love relationships and friendship relationships may help us make better choices and move past our expectations which often may not be realized.
The four types of love relationships are:
- karmic
- transitory
- soulful
- compromise
Understanding the reality of our relationships allows us to navigate through them with ease and without unnecessary complications.
Carmen points out that we know that to give lovingly to any human being nurtures the soul—at least if that soul accepts one’s loving actions. However we also know that love must be given freely and must return to us in a similar way. When a person is thoughtless, selfish or cruel, the GIVER DOES CREATES GOOD KARMA but also receives the bad karma created by the ungrateful recipient of their good deeds. The Giver will experience feelings of sadness, anger disbelief pain and or fear and think that they may not be worthy of love when indeed everyone is worthy of love. Therefore everyone needs to be more careful of to whom they give lovingly. When your relationship begins to feel as if you’re in a class for forgiveness and patience and makes you feel hurt, depressed, pessimistic or feel inadequate, it is time to make some changes….you have to take care of yourself…don’t put up with abuse. Sometimes a relationship is too toxic and dangerous for you to remain in it. We must develop the art of Self-love and become committed to checking our ego so it doesn’t get in the way of evaluating or improving our relationships.”
What is a relationship? The word relationship comes from a Latin root meaning “restore.” All relationships are meant to restore people back to their natural state of joy and inner peace. We see that karma is at the root of all relationship struggles that make marriages friendships and family relationships complicated and cause pain. Mastering karma frees us from undue suffering so it is indeed the most important challenge we must address in order to have success health and happiness in our lives.
Sheryl would suggest, “First you must start to recognize the pattern from childhood that is reoccurring ..Is it a fear of betrayal, abandonment, or needing to please everyone but yourself in order to secure your safety and survival in a physical world.” Once recognized we also need to know more about how Karma works and how we can make the changes in our thinking and behaviors that will release restore renew or create new possibilities for all our relations. We must begin to understand how Time affects all our choices and outcomes.
The four universal rules of time are:
- Universal Time Rule #1 Everything is in flux
- Universal Time Rule#2 Timing Matters because at any given time, the forces around us support certain activities and not others
- Universal Time Rule# 3 Trying to force matters or pressure people doesn’t work
- Universal Time Rule #4 Impatience calls for Exploration
One can detoxify from a relationship that has grown dysfunctional by going through daily efforts to develop a sense of self worth. Forgive Yourself. Put Yourself first. Say I love you to you. Recognize your strengths. Do something you love each day. Cut out Negative Influences (Make a list of the people in your life who have no place being there..You know who they are who drain you physically, emotionally, or mentally..These people are holding you back from stretching yourself, taking risks and growing. Trim away these negative influences. Release love to yourself (Eliminate criticisms, insecurities, and doubts, celebrate your worth. Thrive on Creativity.
Carmen wrote “The Love we draw in is a reflection not of what we want but of what we Lack. People may not give you what you want—they will give you what they can…If you can accept and understand each person’s unique capacity for love, and each person’s way of expressing that love, you can be happy.”
Overwhelming emotions can make us neglect the reality that not all relationships are meant to last as long as they do and some are not meant to happen at all.
See the bigger picture beyond your own personal ego minded views and know the possibilities to love or hate, to be happy or to suffer, are all a personal choice…choosing wisely allows for you to engage in life enhancing activities while moving away from limiting, damaging, depressing or destructive tendencies, people or behaviors. We may not have control over the challenges that surface but we do have control over how we choose to act.
We have explored the small but mindful approaches we must take each day to resolve our outstanding karma by modifying behavior, elevating self-love, and practicing exercises to purify renew and restore energy. Miraculous relationships are the product of eradicating the negative effects of the past and creating new positive karma for a joyful healthy and prosperous future. Carmen Harra has compassionately revealed once again the source of a fulfilled and meaningful life which is the ability to consciously love and be loved.
Sheryl feels we must realize that Karma is perhaps the number one driving force beyond all our experiences and relationships and is the reason a soul chooses a physical life incarnation in order to complete certain cycles, feel and refine emotions attitudes behaviors and learn greater love for Self and others. In understanding how past lives and childhood experiences influence our present relationships we can discover how to reverse any negative pattern and awaken to infinite possibilities for creating a new life filled with joy and wisdom.
Carmen and Alexandra would have you remember, “Love is Universal and Love is your birthright and Love extends far beyond romantic relationships. There’s familial love, parent/child love, the love you share with close friends, love you share with people around you who live nearby or work with, and love you have for strangers simply because like you, they’re just people trying to live happily…And of course there’s love for our animal companions. This abundance of love has the potential to inspire us to create wonderful karma. But because our egos cause us to be scared of losing love, or not being loved, or not being lovable, we react on our fears and create bad karma—even when we’re with those we love the most Love is the foundation of all relationships and relationships exist so that we can learn to choose love over fear, anger and insecurity. The more love you have in your relationships the more you will thrive—and the more others will survive.”
Carmen, Alexandra and Sheryl would have you begin in this moment to act from a place of love in all your thoughts and behaviors knowing that when we come from that higher state of Conscious Action…. solutions to any situation can be found and people can find a common ground for working and living in harmony to create a more compassionate and humane world population.
